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"pissed everyone off in literally record time" - Recommended by 10 out of 10 people who, for some sad reason, have a dedicated column up to watch #fediblock.

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Himbo Techbro

Secondhand Juniper EX3300-48T Ethernet Switch:
- Makes constant white noise
- 48 RJ-45 gigabit Ethernet ports
- 4 10GbE SFP+ ports
- Layer 3 routing features and BGP
- High availability, redundant paths, GRES and Virtual Chassis stacking
- Price: $20

Yogasleep Dohm Classic White Noise Generator:
- Makes constant white noise
- 0 RJ-45 gigabit Ethernet ports
- 0 10GbE SFP+ ports
- No routing features or BGP support
- No high availability features
- Price: $47.97

If you're in the market for a white noise machine, why the fuck would you ever get one that *doesn't* forward IP traffic? I mean, come on.